Lucy’s In The Grey Zone

Sweet Lucy
Sweet Lucy
Oh my, yes it’s true, and I guess in a way I think it’s kinda sudden, and in a way it’s not. Lucy has been on the decline for a while now. Years, in fact. She’s had this awful limp for going on 5 years or more, that the vets could never figure out… yup, I just looked at her Rally Advanced title, that she got in 2006, and I think she barely squeaked by just starting to limp back then.

Anyway, then she was diagnosed with Megaesophagus back in 2009. At that time the vet told us that her organs would probably start breaking down. But she has hung in there and done okay since then. My husband made her a Bailey’s Chair and she’s done good with it, keeping her food down and keeping her weight up.

But she’s been losing muscle strength for a long time, now. Muscle mass, yes, and just strength too. When I woke up, I think it was Wednesday morning, her elbow was sticking out at a weird angle. So we took her into the vet on Friday. They said she probably pulled a muscle or something and she doesn’t have the strength to stand much anymore, nor does she really have the capacity to heal. She’s 12.5 years old now. I was really thinking, just a couple of weeks ago, that maybe she really would make 13… but now we are thinking we are going to have to say goodbye to her this week already. 🙁

She can’t hardly walk now. She tries to put her weight on legs that will support her, but there really aren’t any legs left that will. She still likes to eat, and her mind seems okay. But her body is failing her. So it’s such a grey zone now. She’s not really healthy enough to be alive, but she’s not really unhealthy enough to be dead… so we really are not sure what to do. But the more I watch her, the more I’m leaning toward letting her go this week. 🙁

Of course I’ve been crying off and on for the last couple of days. We can’t do anything until next week, of course. But it’s so sad. Lucy is a link to my past that none of the other dogs have. My old house, my old life before my husband and I were married. When she goes, that link will be completely gone. And I’ve always considered her the cornerstone of our pack. Though she’s very weak now and doesn’t exert much of an influence anymore. Tatum will definitely take over as pack leader. Tatum will be our only girl left….

And we only put Angel down a year ago last May. So that is still fresh too. Ugh. The roughest part of sharing life with a dog I love so much. I letting them go. I love Lucy with all my heart, and I really don’t want her to go away.

22 thoughts on “Lucy’s In The Grey Zone”

  1. I know how hard it is last year I have to say goodbye to my beloved Danish Swedish Farmdog
    Miffe (Haritzas Elvis) he was 14 years old and my everything. It is one year ago in 4 August the only comfort is that we have to be grateful to have them so long and thanks them for the good times .

    Regards
    Christina

  2. Cynthia, I feel for you. This is hardest part of having pets, knowing when to let them go. At least she had a good, long life with you. Give her a hug for me…

    Flo

  3. I’m so sorry Christina, it so very hard to let them go! It’s the most awful decision in the world it seems. 🙁

    1. Yes is very hard and awful to let them go but for me there was only one decision to make because he had a tumor I can still be very said but somewhere inside I know he has no pain now. There are things I don´t want to do because it remind me to much about him.

      Christina

  4. This is very sad, to see one’s beloved dog like this. And it’s so terribly difficult to have to make that final decision. My heart goes out to you.

  5. So Sorry Cyn! It does seem like it hasn’t been that long since you endured this with Angel. The brevity of our pups lives is the only bad thing about them. It’s never easy, but I know you will let her go at the right time and with dignity as you have always helped her live the same way. So so sorry!

    1. Thanks Katie… Angel passed only a year ago last May. It’s much too soon for another. Levi just better live for a long time still.

  6. I am so very sorry…what a lucky dog to have someone care for her and love her like you have, and I am sure she has paid you back many times over, but I can not even imagine how it must feel to have to make these sort of decisions and to see her not well. ((HUGS)) I wish there was something I could do to help, but we are thinking of you both and will remember you in our prayers…

    1. Thanks Kathy. It’s a tough decision, hardest I’ve ever had to make. I wish they would all just go peacefully in their sleep before they are in pain.

  7. so sorry to hear. she is a sweetheart. she knows you love her. our hearts are with you. please give her pets from ALL of us here. lmk if there is anything at all we can do for y’all.

  8. Oh no… So, so sad… It’s so incredibly difficult being in that grey zone like you described it… I was there with my dear old cat two years ago and still remember it like it was yesterday, so stressful, so hard to know when is the right time. Thinking of you.

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