Bad Things and Good Things

Lucy, Levi and Angel 2002

I’m being all sentimental lately. Freaked out, entirely, that time is going by so fast and my dogs are dying. And, it looks like, the cat too. Littles. She’s in kidney failure and we will probably put her down next week, but we can only deal with one animal’s death at a time.

Lucy’s death day is Wednesday. I made the appointment. At this moment I’m not crying, but in five minutes I might be again. I’ve been going through old pictures looking at Lucy, Levi and Angel. Angel left us in May 2010. I am so upset that time goes by so fast. The next thing I know, 10 years will have passed and Lucy will have been gone for 10 years… just like Kip has been gone for 11 years now. Oh my, not good things to think about, eh? I remember thinking, years ago, as I lay on my bed one day, that I had all three young healthy dogs… Lucy, Levi and Angel. And now Angel is gone, Lucy is going, and Levi better be around for a couple more years or I’ll have a nervous breakdown.

About the picture, our front room no longer looks like that. That was when we had carpet (see the stains, lol), and the couch upstairs. Now we have tile and the couch and TV are downstairs. Though we might move them back up again so Levi doesn’t have to do the stairs. He’s getting too old for stairs and it seems to bother him sometimes. Levi is 11.5.

I always worry about forgetting the dogs too much after they die. But yesterday I realized that, even if my memory is poor and I don’t remember all the little details, I will never forget them with my heart. And I’ll always remember how they feel inside me. As they will always be with me in a way. Even as they take a big chunk of my heart with them.

I don’t usually combine different topics in one post but I have to temper Lucy’s pending death with a good note about Jet and agility. I looked him up on the AKC website today, and his AX and AXJ show, and so do his MACH points. Yay! I love that the AKC lets us see those online for free. I’ll post the pictures here below. My first MACH points with any dog, ever.

Below is a picture of our front room after we remodeled it, but there’s nice pictures up now. I just wanted a pic of the 3 smooth blue collies, and my husband is there too. Lucy is, of course, on the table. She always stood on the table to block our view of the TV when she wanted attention. LOL

Lucy on the Table

And here is Jet’s AX and AXJ. Oh, and I almost forgot to mention, as it’s kinda a side note that I hope will happen in December 2012. But as it stands now, Jet has qualified for the AKC Agility Invitationals. So as long as 5 other Danish-Swedish Farmdogs don’t start doing AKC Agility and beat us out, we should be able to go. I sure hope so. But… I do want to go and be competitive, and not just go because we are the only dog of our breed who qualified. Though if that’s how we get in, I’ll take it, and I won’t complain! LOL

Jet's AKC Titles To Date

Jet’s qualification to the AKC Agility Invitationals:

Danish-Swedish Farmdog AKC Agility Invitationals

Jet AKC Invitationals

Remembering Angel

Sweet Angel

Well, it’s been one year since Angel died and left us. Yes, it still makes me cry. I miss her very much. I think she had a good life with us, even though she came to us with a broken leg, fresh out of the shelter, too skinny and feeling bad.

Over the years we got her healthy, maybe a bit chubby, and gave her lots of love. I remember chasing her around the house when she had a sock. She ran slowly, but the look of sheer joy on her face was priceless. I miss chasing her around the house. I miss holding her and loving her and being with her. It’s weird to think that she no longer exists in this world. Sometimes I count the dogs and I know that one is missing. Sometimes I expect to see her, feel her, know she’s around.

This is a cute, typical picture of her, up top. She could never curl up on her own, her body wasn’t built very well. But she loved to snuggle in beds, and some other terror collie (Tatum, lol) chewed a nice hole in that couch. Angel liked to take advantage of it until we took the couch to the dumb.

I miss you Angel. Someday I hope to see you again. Until then, I hope you are cruising around whatever existence you are in, enjoying yourself completely. I love you Angel.

Lovely Angel

When We Were Just Four

Four Pups

I’ve been looking at old pictures lately… I have my Macbook set up to use my photo folders as my screen saver. It’s a dangerous thing… because I can just sit and watch it for hours. 😛 Well maybe not hours, but for a good long time that’s for sure.

Makes me think about term life insurance and getting old and stuff. Especially since many of the pictures have Angel in them. And yeah I still cry quite often because she’s gone and I’ll never see her in this life again. It still makes me sad. Though I know she’s not in pain anymore. And I have to remember her when she was alive and happy and full of life.

Anyway, so this picture is of me and my husband and the four we had at the time… Lucy, Levi, Angel and Chase. Boy did Chase look out of place with the three smooth blue collies. LOL. Now we have more different breeds so he fits in a bit better. 🙂

Last Pictures of Angel

Angel

I just want to say, it’s my blog and I can cry if I want to. 🙂 Yes, I am still mourning Angel, and I still miss her a lot. I just loaded up these last pictures of her that were on my camera.

This was when her eye was still working.  Three days before she died.  My heart is still heavy and sore with her loss.  Though my husband and I have talked about her, remembering all the good things. Like when she would warm up like a motor boat down the hallway when the neighbor would drag their garbage can down the driveway, and she would get outside and bark at them. Or at the garage door.  She would always bark at those two things. Silly girl.

She loved pig ears and she loved walks and camping. She was so scared when we first got her, but she grew and became more and more confident all the time. I still miss her every day.

Getting Better

Jet's Play Moves

Well, I’m getting better, though it’s slow going. I was kinda manic yesterday, different than my depression I’ve had for the last week since we put Angel down. Jet makes me laugh, he is such a goof. This is him making play moves towards his new German Shepherd friend Lenka, who is not in the photo, but really should be. 🙂 She came from Slovakia in her Mom’s belly, and was born in Texas. Both of them are from far, far away!

I did agility last weekend with Chase, too. Haven’t had the gumption to post any videos yet. I also entered Tatum in prenovice again, she did really well! I have video of her too I need to get up. She is doing well, though she was a bit nervous.

So life goes on, even though Angel has died. So sad. I will miss her for the rest of my life and I hope she is flying free somewhere having a great old time. I do believe something happens after death, I just don’t know what it is. Someday I will find out… we all find out eventually.

So I better get back to looking for some cheap insurance companies so we will have car insurance for our trip to Denmark in June! Ack, it’s coming up so fast!