Not Ready To Let Go Of Angel Yet

Angel in February 2006

Okay, I can’t do it. I think my husband would probably follow my lead if I said that we have to make the decision to let Angel go. But I can’t. Despite my sore knees from carrying her up and down the stairs for the last couple of weeks… she’s eating again, as long as she has good smelly stuff in her food. And she potties okay outside. And I’ve been giving her water from a water bottle with a rubbery tip. It works really well. She gets more water that way than she does trying to get it out of the bucket or any stone sinks, but we only have water buckets set up for the dogs.

The night before last I had her on the bed with me, and she did well. She slept most of the night and only woke me up twice to potty and get some water.  Once at midnight and once at 5:30 am.  5:30 am is my normal time to get up anyway.  But since it was the weekend I went back to bed.

Last night, however, she didn’t do as good. I put her on my bed and she struggled to get up. I don’t want her falling off, so I’m glad that it’s hard for her to stand up on the bed, she wakes me up easily.  So I got up with her about 3 times between 9pm and midnight.  And she still wouldn’t settle. I took her potty and gave her water too. She didn’t poop though… so, thinking I really had to get some sleep so I could work today, I turned her out of the bedroom and closed the door. I felt really bad. I left the dog door open and she had many dog beds to chose from. I hope she chose one and not the tile floor.  But then again maybe she’s hot and the cool tile feels better for her.

This morning when I woke up there was quite a bit of urine on the tile. Mostly clear.  Did I say earlier that she did test positive for a very minor bladder infection? The vet said they wouldn’t normally treat such a minor infection in a younger dog, but since she’s so old, we are treating it with antibiotics once a day.  So maybe the pills will help.  She also had a high Bilirubin in her blood test… the vet said high normal. Otherwise her bloodwork was all good, kidneys and liver fine. Hrmph.

So we are going day by day and seeing how she is. I just wish she would let us a sleep a bit better at night. She seems to sleep most of the day, but then she fusses at night. Poor girl.  I adore her, I want her to be comfortable. I don’t think she has much quality of life… but she’s not in pain, and she does get happy. My husband took her for a walk yesterday…. she went 2 houses then laid down. He had to carry her home. But she had happy look on her face, and that’s what matters.

5 thoughts on “Not Ready To Let Go Of Angel Yet”

  1. The last several months of both Renoir and Ben’s lives walks consisted of carrying them around the yard. It still made them smile.

  2. Oh, Cynthia, I’m so sorry that Angel’s reaching this stage of her life. I know how much you love her and how careful you are being to balance her quality of life with her difficulties. And the best thing is that she knows that you’re there for her, loving her, and doing what’s best for her. She’s a very lucky girl that she found you to be her mommy, just as you’re very lucky to have had her to enrich your life.
    .-= SheltieJim´s last blog ..Pet Insurance =-.

  3. Cynthia,

    I came across your blog just tonight to find that you just recently had to say goodbye to a loved one. I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. I do hope time and the love of your other “four-legged” kids help ease the pain.

    I have a chocolate lab myself and can not even bear the thought of ever having to say goodbye to her.

    Have you considered posting a site on Squidoo in her honor. I learned about that from someone else who did a site in honor of their pet that they had to say goodbye to. It served as a great memory and way to honor their loved one. I liked the idea so much that I created a page for my girl Haley. It’s just a thought.

    Anyway, best wishes to you.


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